It's Just A Thursday......
Today is one of the bad days, I feel like an utter failure and disappointment, and the worst part is I can’t shake it off. I would usually pick myself up, but I’m not that strong today.
People think I’m smart, strong, intelligent, and resilient. I know I am, but it comes with its own pressure to put up faces and be who everyone expects you to be.
Some days I really just want to stay in bed and forget the world exists. I have a strong support system, but on some days even that isn’t enough. I know and trust in God, but right now even that seems very far-fetched.
Today I feel broken, useless, unbecoming, disloyal, stupid, and untrustworthy. Today I feel like I am letting everyone down, today I just want to watch movies and fill myself with sugar hoping the day passes fast and tomorrow comes with a brighter hope, but adulthood calls, and I have to answer, I have to suck it up and be a responsible adult.
Today I am not strong, today I can’t shake it off, today I just want to be free, today I just want to be me, today I just want to be by myself, today I don’t want to think of anyone, today I want my mind to be free of everything, just empty, processing nothing, today………..
I know today will pass and I’ll be happy again, I’ll be strong again, I’ll be smart again, I’ll be resilient again. Today won’t define me, it’s just another Thursday……
How are you doing today?
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~The Christian Feminist~